Thursday, 15 July 2010


Yes, all right, I know I said in my last post that I was going to live in a tent and yet here I still am, within four brick walls, corrugated iron over my head. This is because, since my hasty decision yesterday, I have discovered certain things about life under canvas. I list the main ones below:
1) It is cold if the season is winter (as it is here, now)
2) It is wet if it rains torrentially (as it did last night)
3) It has a tendency to transform into life under the stars if there is a gale force wind (as there was last night)
4) There is an absence of bathroooms and, whilst it may be argued that standing in torrential rain is a form of showering, there are advantages to having a supply of hot water and the ability to step out of a shower and into a dry place
I am sure others will point out that these facts were all well-known already - even, possibly, self-evident. What I say in response to that is: why then do people do camp? A lot of my neighbours actually do it for a holiday. Is it just the banging-your-head-against-the-wall-so-nice-when-it-stops syndrome? Someone said something to me once about atavism - not, it turns out, a 3-D movie. Well, I may object to pings and squeaks and insistent electronic nagging, but that's as far as my atavism goes.


  1. you forgot to mention one other major reason not to go camping in Australia - BLOODY GREAT BIG HAIRY SPIDERS

  2. When I used to go to the Australian Embassy in Vienna there was always a room full of would-be Balkan migrants waiting to apply to move here. In the corner of the room, to keep them entertained, there was a television, on which a video on permanent loop played during office hours - the video was called 'Poisonous spiders and snakes of Australia'. Oddly, it didn't seem to put anyone off